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Tense Tenses….Past or Present?

by Sue McKlveen
(submitted to the Gulf Coast Romance Writers website)

Which do you prefer to read or write? Past tense or present tense?

Most stories are written in past tense, but there seems to be a new fad around the corner to write in present tense. It brings the reader into the immediacy of the action, not knowing if the characters or narrator will make it by the end of the book. Most readers won’t really notice what tense is used, but will notice if it’s done badly or the tenses are mixed.

I recently read a book written in present tense, but I didn’t figure it out until about thirty pages into the story. The story is what sold the book for me, and even though I’m not a fan of the genre, it was chick lit. Not all chick lit is written in present tense, but present tense seems to be making its way into all genres of literature.

Here’s an example of a woman walking off a train in New York City for the first time written in past and present tense.

Past tense:

She watched as the doors to the train opened and stairs were lowered for her to finally touch the hallowed ground of New York City. She’d dreamed of this day for so long, since she’d been a little girl.

Unable to believe she had actually made it, she admired the architecture and the crowds, pulling her suitcase behind her. After the long train ride, she was hungry and tired, so she strutted toward a small deli and walked inside.

Present tense (any reference to past events are explained in past tense):

She watches as the doors to the train open and stairs are lowered for her to finally touch the hallowed ground of New York City. She’d dreamed of this day for so long, since she’d been a little girl.

Unable to believe she has actually made it, she admires the architecture and the crowds, pulling her suitcase behind her. After the long train ride, she’s hungry and tired, so she struts toward a small deli and walks inside.

Writing present tense is like writing a synopsis. It takes some getting used to, and not very easy to do. Instead of writing ‘she said’, the author would write ‘she says’. It’s odd to read, but once the reader gets used to it, they ignore the tense.

In the previous illustration, the present tense passage only shifted to past tense when talking about the past. But sometimes, certain words can jar the past-tense passage into present tense without the writer realizing it. When talking about time that is here and now, but using past tense, it can be jarring.

Consider the following sentence. Jane knew she’d eaten today, but couldn’t remember what was put into her mouth.

The word ‘today’ is jarring for the reader. I’ve seen constructions such as this many times in my reading, and to me, it just doesn’t fit. Today is talking about the present.

It’d work much better if written: Jane knew she’d eaten that day, but couldn’t remember what was put into her mouth.

The same thing goes with the words ‘this’, ‘now’, and words that indicate that something is happening at this particular point in time.

An example of this follows: Going to the store was like taking her medicine this morning—painful.

The word ‘this’ is jarring to the reader. They’ll probably skim over it and not realize it, but it’d be better written like the following: Going to the store was like taking her medicine that morning—painful.

Another example: Jim glanced around the corner, now sure he’d seen the killer.
Versus:
Jim glanced around the corner, sure he’d seen the killer.

The word ‘now’ is jarring as well, bringing the present into a past-tense sentence.

Whatever you decide—past or present tense, make sure your entire story is in the same tense. Jarring your readers by using a word or two from the other tense or incorrect time words will slow the pacing and make the reader wonder if they’re in present or past tense. If done right and the tense matches, they won’t care.

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